Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Its Not So Hard To Say Goodbye To Yesterday.....

I don't know where this road is going to lead.
All I know is where we've been and what we've been through. If we get to see tomorrow, I hope it's worth all the wait
It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.
- Boyz II Men

 You know what I decided today? Its not that hard to say goodbye to yesterday. Really...its not. 

Yesterday I was disappointed. Today, hopeful. Yesterday I was feeling rejected. Today, loved. Yesterday I felt like a failure. Today, taken care of. Yesterday I couldn't love well. Today, I have so much to give. Yesterday I hadn't forgiven. Today, I did. Who cares about what used to be...could have been...almost was. Maybe I was right...maybe I was wrong...maybe I ruined everything. That was yesterday. 

     Its not my problem anymore. I gave it to Him. And He has everything well at hand.So you see....today is so much better than yesterday. Its not hard to say goodbye at all. 

"God makes everything come out right;
      he puts victims back on their feet....God is sheer mercy and grace; not easily angered, he's rich in love. He doesn't endlessly nag and scold, nor hold grudges forever.He doesn't treat us as our sins deserve,
      nor pay us back in full for our wrongs. 
          As high as heaven is over the earth, so strong is his love to those who fear him.    And as far as sunrise is from sunset, he has separated us from our sins. As parents feel for their children,
      God feels for those who fear him.  He knows us inside and out, keeps in mind that we're made of mud.
   God's love, though, is ever and always, eternally present to all who fear him...."

Psalm 103:12 The Message

Thursday, August 26, 2010

The Happy Clock....

"But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." 2 Peter 3:8-9
 So today my little friend Carden, age two, was playing in the living room and he looked up at a large clock hanging on the wall behind the couch. He pointed to it and loudly declares, " Tock!" 
He then looks at it a minute and this time he says, "Tock....happy tock!" I just smiled at him and agreed that it is indeed a "happy clock". I kind of chuckled a bit at the randomness of the statement. I mean, its just a big clock....really nothing outwardly happy in its appearance. But for some reason those words stuck with me, "happy clock". 
So after my little friend and his equally curious and adorable sister went down for a nap, I sat and thought about the aforementioned words...."happy clock". 
If you have been a Christian, around a Christian or have breezed by the Trinity Broadcasting Network while flipping channels on the t.v., you have probably heard the statement "In the Lord's timing" or "God's timing is perfect". And how many of us, when we hear that or think that, really believe it? Or is it just something we rattle off when things aren't going our way? Or when we have been praying and praying and nothing seems to be happening? 
Well....let me be the first hand raised. I don't really believe it most of the time. That is proved in how often I take the "don't worry God...I got this." I mean, why involve the Creator of the universe in my problems when I clearly am capable of handling things on my own? Never mind the fact that its that same need to fix everything all the time that usually starts the problems I have in the first place. And its my complete lack of patience and trust that makes waiting on the Lord a non-existent activity most of the time. How many of us have thrown in the towel when in comes to our hopes and dreams? How many of have given up hope all together that the things God has shown us will ever be a reality in our lives? 
Then I had this thought.... why not a happy clock? why should I spend what little time on that clock worrying about what's not happening than focusing on what is and being happy about it? I thought about all the plans I had made for myself and the time constraints I put on them all....married by then....kids by then....full time ministry here.....home owner by then....and so on and so on. And then I look around and see how little of this has actually happened..pretty much none of it. But in the time that would have been spent being apart of those things, He put me in new things...things I never would have imagined I would do.
And in those things He taught me so much more about myself and about His will for my life and who He really is. Who knows if I would have learned those things had circumstances been any different? So do I sit here and feel sorry for myself, shaking my fist at the Lord that these plans I had are still packed away somewhere...or do I have a heart of gratitude for the fact that I have learned so much and experienced things I never thought I would? And at the end of the day, I see it was all for my benefit and His glory. How can I be angry at that? If we believe Him at His word :

"Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21)

"Able to do exceedingly abundantly above all we ask or think..." Hmm....so maybe all the times I prayed for His will in my life...I prayed for my inheritance...my destiny...I prayed for this or that...and in my head it looked one way...in His, it was a whole other picture...and so much greater than my feeble little brain could comprehend. So if He can imagine so much more amazing things that even my wildest of dreams...than what the heck am I doing? Lord please.....what ever you see in Your head for my life....do that. How can I lose?

I like the Message version of one of my favorite verses: "I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for."

Well I guess that pretty much says it all. So instead of tapping our foot and frustrated with God because our plans aren't happening, let's thank Him for this season and what He's doing and trust that His timing really is perfect. Its a happy clock.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

He Loves Us...Oh How He Loves Us.

"Oh he is jealous for me....He loves like a hurricane...I am a tree....bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy...And all of the sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory...And I realize just how beautiful You are and how great your affections are for me...And oh...how He loves us...oh...How He loves us....oh.." 
-John Mark McMillan

" Bravo, God, bravo! Gods and all angels shout, "Encore!"
In awe before the glory, in awe before God's visible power. Stand at attention! Dress your best to honor him! God thunders across the waters, Brilliant, his voice and his face, streaming brightness— God, across the flood waters. God's thunder tympanic, God's thunder symphonic. God's thunder smashes cedars, God topples the northern cedars. The mountain ranges skip like spring colts, The high ridges jump like wild kid goats. God's thunder spits fire. God thunders, the wilderness quakes; He makes the desert of Kadesh shake. God's thunder sets the oak trees dancing ...A wild dance, whirling; the pelting rain strips their branches. We fall to our knees—we call out, "Glory!" Above the floodwaters is God's throne from which his power flows, from which he rules the world. God makes his people strong. God gives his people peace. " Psalm 29 The Message Bible.

We are the cedars you bend and break with Your glorious,thundering voice. Its breaks our heart....it breaks our will...it breaks our pride. It breaks us to replant us...to root us and ground us in love...Your love. But its not always breaking You desire...sometimes its bending that matters most. To bend so we don't have to break. We were created to blow like the wind...to move and flow in grace and wisdom in this life. To dance at Your leading. The breaking comes only when we plant our feet and refuse to move, to bend to Your will. Teach us to be more pliable....to be led by Your Spirit and be faithful to the call. And when we do it with love, for You and You're Word....it becomes less like bending and more like bowing. 
Jesus...if gods and angels know how to stand in awe and wonder of Your work, how much more should we as Your children, the ones You gave Your life to save. Your voice...Your glorious, powerful, thundering voice that crashes through trees and splits the heat from the flame just to whisper in our ear "I love you....I will never leave you...Be still and know that I am God." You are so jealous for our attention, You would destroy Your creations to make us aware of it. You are Glorious....You are Powerful...You are Mighty....You are Loving...You are Majestic....You are Merciful....You are Wonderful....You are Awe-Inspiring....You are Radiant....You are a Terrifying Force of Brilliance and Strength. You are not safe Father...but You are good. Let us be jealous for all Your attention and to see the will of our Father carried out. Nothing else matters but this.

In Jesus Name I pray,

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Breathe In...Breathe Out....Repeat...

Thank you that no matter how many tirades and rantings I post in the blog...how many times I forget to be grateful....how many times I don't see all Your blessings...all the times I don't see You at all.....
You still love me anyway. No matter what. And You are teaching me to see the unseen...know the unknown and live each day in surrender. I'll I have to do is breathe in...out....repeat.